Attention Toronto douchebags: you need a new wardrobe.

In the short time it took me to run three miles today, I saw four of you walk by wearing exactly the same thing: camouflage cargo shorts, pastel polo shirt w/ popped collar (this is crucial; the popped collar elevates one beyond the level of plain old wannabe and into the douch-y heavens), flip flops and aviator sunglasses. You also all had the same spiky hair.

While I admire your willingness to beat down any niggling scrap of individuality or free thinking you might’ve once been infected with, you may have taken it too far. I don’t think that even your mother could pick you out in a crowd anymore.

Baaaaaaa.

[tags]douchebag, popped collar[/tags]