The sweetest beep that ever there was

Well, the gas leak saga seems to be nearly over. Today some people from the building came by with a new dude. This new dude had an actual piece of gas-detecting equipment…how novel. Anyway, he climbs up on the stepladder and sticks the device into the wall panel…nothing. The other three get smug looks of satisfaction, and comment on how there’s no smell so there’s clearly no leak. But then the new dude turns on the gas (the shutoff valve has been closed), puts the device back in the wall and…oh, what’s that, a beep? A FUCKING BEEP? Yeah, a beep. Within seconds this thing went off. Then the guy did the “soap test”, where you spray a little soapy water on the pipe to see if it bubbles. This is the test the building guys have been doing for the last few weeks, swearing up and down that there’s no leak. The new dude does it once and five seconds later has bubbles. The other guy gives it a try…nothing. The new dude explains that it’s because he just emptied half a bottle of water onto it and temporarily sealed it up. Twenty seconds later…beeeeeeep. Hooray for technology.

It was all I could do not to go put on a track suit and do a Will Farrell style cheer. For the last month these people have ignored us, talked down to us, bitched at us, told us we’re wrong and, let’s face it, put us in danger. Seriously, I couldn’t even look at them; I wouldn’t have been able to refrain from just giving them the finger at close range. But I didn’t want to be that guy. I figured I’d just blog about their snotty incompetence instead.

The one time I wasn’t able to contain myself was when the new dude told them the leak was on the trac pipe adapter to the supply line. I said, “Oh really? Cool. ‘Cause that’s exactly what it says right here on this notice from Enbridge. You know, the big red one labeled ‘WARNING’ that’s been stuck to the wall by the access panel? That’s dated June 18th? That says, ‘MSA POS AT TRAC PIPE FITTING ADAPTER ON SUPPLY LINE’? Yeah, that one.”

One of the ladies from customer service, who’s been pretty bipolar about this whole thing (one minute she seems helpful, the next she seems annoyed) couldn’t even stay after new dude discovered the leak. She just left. Who knows, maybe she had somewhere to be, but I think she just couldn’t handle being that stupendously wrong. I hope she went downstairs and told the rest of them how colossally they’ve fucked up for the last month. I hope they’re all scared for their jobs. Not because we’re the kind of people who would try to have them fired, but because it might convince them to actually give a shit the next time someone complains about a problem with their unit. Especially a gas leak.

Anyway, the guy came up and fixed it. Took him less than half an hour. He probably spent more time in here spraying it with Palmolive for the last month than he did actually fixing it, but it’s done. He got the new dude to test it again, and it seemed fine.

To celebrate, we barbecued. And every bite tasted like triumphant morsels of fuck you.

.:.

Other good news: my computer’s almost back up to speed. Still no sound card, but the USB is 2.0 again and the internet connection’s back. I used said connection to download two new albums tonight: Spoon‘s Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga and StarsIn Our Bedroom After the War.

.:.

Also, after the disaster that was last week, it’s felt good to do three things today: 1) go for a run; 2) get home by 6:30; 3) not do a scrap of work or school tonight. None…on a weeknight! Truant! Truant!

[tags]spire condominium, gas leak, enbridge, spoon, stars[/tags]

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