The roar of the Forth road bridge

Not three months ago we saw Frightened Rabbit play at the Mod Club, a tour to mark the tenth anniversary of their breakout album The Midnight Organ Fight. Lindsay had never seen them, and I hadn’t seen them in some nine years, since they toured the album originally. Despite a great show the obnoxious crowd prompted us to bugger off a bit early. I regret that now.

A few days ago, lead singer Scott Hutchinson (who’d struggled publicly with depression) went missing. His bandmates (and brother) asked for help finding him, but today a body found in the Firth of Forth was confirmed to be that of Hutchinson.

Since hearing the news I haven’t been able to shake loose from my head the lyrics of the penultimate song from Midnight Organ Fight, “Floating In The Forth”.

And I picture this corpse
On the M8 hearse
And I half run away to sleep
On a rolled up coat
Against the window
With the strobe of the sun
And the life I’ve led
Am I ready to leap
Is there peace beneath
The roar of the Forth road bridge?
On the Northern side
There’s a Fife of mine
And a boat in the port for me,

And fully clothed, I float away
Down the Forth, into the sea
I’ll steer myself
Through drunken waves
These manic gulls
Scream it’s okay
Take your life
Give it a shake
Gather up
All your loose change
I think I’ll save suicide for another year.

I’m angry at the depression that took him. I’m sad that I’ll never see him perform again. I’m worried that the tour on which he sang this song each night resurrected old thoughts in his head. I’m gutted that no one could really do anything to help, even those who loved him. I wish this disease weren’t so insidious and invisible, famous or not.

Rest easy, Scott. It’s okay.

It’s okay.

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One response to “The roar of the Forth road bridge

  1. I ran across this video of a solo version of The Modern Leper I’d never seen before. It hit me pretty hard.

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